I had my laser appointment today.  Spa-Kim poked me in my hip bone and said "Look how boney you're getting!"  I love that.

Jen and I are freaking out over the scenes from next week for Gilmore Girls.  If Rory's pregnant, I'm gonna hunt down the Palladinos and kill 'em.  Or at least really yell for a while.

So, I looked into a software Bob recommended for my blog, which would help me control the fake posts in the comments.  However, to get my hosting company to support it, I'd have to pay twice as much--and that's only if I pay for the whole year in advance.  So I think it's going to have to be this way for a while.

Is anybody else a little nervous that Alan Greenspan retired?

Also, since it made Bob nervous, I would like to clarify that Jen gave me chicken eggs.  This is not some arrangement regarding her personal ova.
 

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/31/06

Today is the second anniversary of the day my cousin Nick was killed.  There was a memorial mass this morning.  I didn't see the relatives I was looking to sit with when I got there, so I just sat by myself, assuming they'd see me when they did get there.  I just sat quietly and prayed for the same thing I always do:  for God to put me where he wants me to be, and to bring the Sloans back to us.

I missed my last chance to see Nick because I was just being lazy.  Bobby's first birthday party--I woke up late and since it was in Gerald, I just didn't go.  I've killed myself over that for two years, but it taught me the most important thing I've ever learned:
 

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/30/06

Today was Pride & Prejudice day, finally!  Jen & I decided to get together, watch 5 hours of Colin Firth being broody & gorgeous, and eat things that were in no way good for us.

On the menu:  Soda, Hot Wing Dip, Popcorn, and Cake.  I made the dip & popcorn, Jen baked the cake--and it was yum.

Dialogue from the day:

So, while she is still nursing a mad desire for the new Mr. Darcy, she acknowledges that the old version is a much prettier movie, and that Colin Firth does a much better job of showing you that he's slowly falling in love with Elizabeth, you can see it come over him.  Plus, Jen kept shouting lines from the new movie that aren't in the old one (or the book), hence the title of today's post.

And, since my father has been demanding it (and Jen has a nice digital camera that she agreed to let me use), I have some pictures of my table top mosaic to share.  I'm not entirely done.  I still need to polyurethane over the entire thing, but I wanted to wait until the weather would allow me to open windows for several days before I attempted that, so you can still see the matte medium around the squares (the dull bits).

And also, just to clarify, I don't have some sort of weird obsessive crush on Rivers Cuomo (link goes to his blog, which is good, you should read it).  I just think he's really cool, and since he's going to be near my friend with the stalker tendencies, it seemed appropriate.
 

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/28/06

Okay, I'm convinced.  Love Monkey is awesome.  Know why?  Ben Folds cameo!  I thought it'd have just lots and lots of made up bands & singers, with all the hip bands on the t-shirts & posters.  But then, out of nowhere, Ben Folds!  He's getting thin on top.  Poor Ben.

Too Late?

Urgh.  This feels creepy and weird.  Is it too late to put the stopper back on that moratorium?  I don't want to give myself the temptation of being bitter and vindictive here.  I don't want to be that girl, and I don't want this blog to become that.  I try to be fun and entertaining most of the time, and bitching and moaning isn't that.  So I think I'm going to try to keep this a place where I'm positive.

This does not mean you are safe from Greg Behrendt quotes.  I still find them HIGHLY entertaining.  Even the chapter titles are good--like the title of the Bonus Chapter:  "Dude, Get Off Her Lawn!:  The Tough-Guy's Breakup Buddy".

I talked to Reon online today!  She's looking for work in St. Louis, so that's exciting!!  I hope she gets a job here, that'll be fun.

This week's songs so far:

Monday:  Falling for You - Weezer

Tuesday:  Laid - Matt Nathanson

I like that song.  Had to play that one a couple more times once I got home, while I was getting changed to go to Curves.  Tomorrow's weigh-in day, so we'll see how the Curves scales compare with my bathroom scale.

Gilmore Girls is a repeat again!  Only two new ones and we're back to repeats?  Not fair.  Daily Show/Colbert Report it is, then.  Buttheads.  I read online that the WB & UPN are being eliminated.  Warner Brothers and CBS are getting together and making a station called CW instead.  That seems dumb.  They've finally branded a decently strong image for the WB, and now they're getting rid of it?

I'm update-y lately.

Hey, check it out:
Harry Potter Posts: 15
Non-Potter Posts: 20!!
 

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/24/06

I think my iPod likes the new system, too.  Right as I was getting ready to leave for the day, iPod picks "I Wanna Be Sedated" by the Ramones--now THAT'S a rock out in the car song.  I was getting really into it yesterday, though.  So much in fact that my lip was starting to curl in a snarl of righteous indignation.

So, on my way back from the distant land of Saint Peters last night, I notice my "check oil" light is on.  Crap.  I don't know any of that space between well enough to know where to stop, so I just hope for the best and head for home.  Of course, all the while I just keep thinking, "What's that smell?  Is that coming from the engine?" and "Is it getting warmer in here?" because I have very little idea how cars work, but have developed the impression that my car will explode if I drive too long on "check oil" (incidentally, if I drive too long on "check gauges" the car just slows down).

So I get to the Mobil, all the while chatting with my Aunt Sa.  I don't know what type of oil the car takes, and it doesn't say in the manual when I look under "Oil, Engine."  She advises 10W-30 and heads to the internet for backup--no luck.  All she can definitively find is that it should say on the dipstick cap (which I knew, but couldn't be bothered to open the hood before going into the store).  I hear a "PSSST!" from behind me and Mobil Guy is mouthing "FIVE-THIRTY!"  So I grab the 5W-30 and pay.

My lack of car knowledge continues out at the car, where I feel around under the hood and find the release lever, but it won't move.  There's no room between the lever and the hood for me to move the lever at all.  I do this a few more times, and I notice Mobil Guy give me the "Just a minute" gesture as he rings up a customer.  Although probably not his intention, this makes me feel like a dip.  However, it also reminds me of the HOOD RELEASE inside the car.  So I did manage to take care of the oil, and Mobil guy came out to chat a bit ("Found the release lever, huh?" and "Was 5W-30 right?") and probably make sure I didn't have another brain fart during the oh-so-complicated process of adding oil.  I'm gonna send an email to the Mobil people.  He was very nice.  At any rate, I don't think I'll forget the type of oil again very soon.

Brokeback Mountain was very good, it was very sad.  I was very proud of the little crowd of teenaged girls for not giggling during the boy sex.  Although the girl behind us seemed to be having some sort of fit--I couldn't tell if she was laughing or gagging or what.  The physicality of the relationship is very minor, so don't let that keep you from going, it's really very good.  It didn't end with the information that Gretchen and I expected, although it may just be that you were to infer it like we did.

Tonight's fun activity is a David Allen Grier show at the Touhill with Jen and Bob.  He cracks me up with just his off the cuff remarks when he's a guest on LoveLine, so I'm looking forward to hearing some actual prepared material.  No update on that until at least tomorrow, since I've yet to go to bed before 1 this week, and will probably pass out as soon as I get in tonight.  I spent the last half hour of work today in a stare-at-the-screen coma.

Haven't mentioned Harry Potter since there was a bezoar on Grey's Anatomy, so I thought I would just add a quick link.  Look at THIS PICTURE.  This girl drew basically EVERY character from Harry Potter so far.  She is amazingly talented.  (There's even a key at the bottom to tell you who everyone is.)

Harry Potter Posts: 15
Non-Potter Posts: 16
(I went back and included every single reference to Harry Potter, even tiny minor ones, just to be completely honest.)
 

I've spent the last three days commute home with my new tradition: the drive time rock out.  I let my iPod on shuffle get me to a good to yell along with song in the car, and then I just keep repeating it until I get home (or I get bored of it, but that hasn't happened yet).

This week's songs and their best lyrics to shout along to:
 

Ben & Kelly are better for yelling to, Green Day is better for wild car dancing, completely ignoring the stares of the people in the other cars, even when they noticeably pull level with the car to watch you.

Now I'm leaving to go see Brokeback Mountain with Gretchen.  Full report tomorrow.
 

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/19/06

I wrote my first poem today.  I like it, but I think it's too personal to put up here.  Besides, I don't want to turn into an emo girl, flooding the internet with her insipid poetry under the delusion of revelation or depth.

I hung out with Bob & Jen tonight.  They took me to Red Robin--where I have never been before--for dinner, and Bob scolded me for getting too boring of a burger.  I like to think of it as being a purist.

Then Bob showed me his crazy Japanese game show clips, and introduced me to the hilarity of Awesometown.

I watched "Love Monkey" tonight--it's a new show with "Ed" from "Ed", it's cute enough, but without the Stars Hollow caliber support staff he had at the bowling alley.
 

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/17/06

Anybody been to Google today?  Did you notice this travesty:

I don't think Dr. King aspired to be the second O in Google.  It's one thing to acknowledge the holiday, but to actually use his head as an O?  That's screwed up.
 

I killed a big scary bug the other day.  It was horrifying.  Mostly because of how it appeared.  I was sitting on the couch and I heard a loud SNAP by my feet.  I looked up and there was this ugly scary bug on the arm of the couch.  I was freaking out, because I'd never seen a bug that gross and ugly before & I didn't know what its powers were.  Does is have flying powers?  Jumping powers?  Running powers?  Biting powers?

So I snuck up on it with a shoe and beat the bejeezus out of it.  Appparently what it actually had was smelling absolutely terrible when squished powers.

When I went to get a tissue to pick it up and throw it away, it got to scare me all over again because it wasn't where I thought it should be laying and I started freaking out that it had somehow survived the beating.

I'm about to.

YAY!  Gilmores are back!

First Gilmore Girls back from hiatus.  I thought it was a good episode, but Lorelai's dress is ugly.  It makes skinny Lorelai look like she's got a roll under her boobs.  It just makes her look dumpy!  Somebody describe the scene I clearly missed:  Lane's back with her parents, and she's pissed at Zach, so they obviously broke up, but I don't remember that.  Help me please!

She should just get back with Dave.  I love Dave Rygalski.  I won't watch the OC because I don't want Dave to be Seth, even if I would love Seth, too.

I've been listening to Bob's CDs.  I'm enjoying the new music!  I haven't listened to all of it, but I think I've listened to at least one song from each new group--the iPod's been giving me some really good stuff on shuffle.

To give you an idea of the scope of the music I got from Bob & Jen (if saying it was 30 CDs wasn't enough) check the iTunes stats:

• Pre Jen & Bob (12/19): 1185 songs, 3 days, 2.86gb
• Today (1/10): 1647 songs, 4.1 days, 3.63gb

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/10/06

Went to see the new Pride & Prejudice with Jen on Friday.  While she is completely head over heels in love with the new Mr. Darcy, I'm still a Colin Firth holdout.  While the new Darcy has very soulful eyes, and a fantastic cross-moor trudge, he just can't compete with the broody beauty of Colin Firth in his heyday.  I've sworn to force her to watch the old A&E version with me.  All 7 heavenly hours.  There were some excellent lines in the new one, such as: 
 

I just really love that phrase "perfectly and incandescently happy." And Mr. Bingley rehearsing with Mr. Darcy was pretty cute, too.

The low point of the movie was easily the two clueless old people sitting next to me.  They couldn't follow the plot to save their lives.  "Who's Mr. Wickham?!?"  "Is that Darcy?!?"  "How many daughters do they have?!?"  "Is that her sister?!?"

Attention Old People:  a guide to Pride & Prejudice.
 

After the movie, Jen & I went back to her house to watch "The Wedding Date" (disappointing), and she let me raid their CD collection for my iPod.  I picked out 20 CDs.  Then Bob provided me with another 10 based on my previous selections (Interpol, Wilco, Hot Hot Heat, My Morning Jacket, PJ Harvey, Rilo Kiley, etc.)

However, this is when the hero stuff comes in--like the huge dork that I am, I managed to leave my keys in the ignition when I was unplugging my iPod to come inside, and locked them snugly inside.  Jen & Bob were sweet enough to let me stay the night with them AND drive me to my mom's (and back) for my spare car key.

This act of heroism is in addition to the evening (which Bob was so sweet to mention) when they came to pick me up from Rachel's bachelorette party when I was drunk off my ass.  ("Kim, why are you crying?  What's wrong?"  "I... DON'T... KNOW, but I CAN'T STOP!!")

Also, you'll all be proud to read, I was chosen as "Rock Star of the Month"  Check it out:

I'd like to thank the staff at Houlihan's for presenting me with this certificate, Jen, for putting my name on it, and all the people who--what?  What do you mean this is just my drink coaster?

I spent all day Saturday ripping the CDs I got from Bob & Jen (which meant installing my old CD burner, since my CD/DVD drive on my laptop has decided it no longer knows what a music CD is) and watching The Office on BBC America.

Today was gift exchange day.  I took back the purse Kirsten got me (very cute, but too big for me), and the Glow-in-the-Dark Tinkerbell sheets I got from my grandma (180 thread count & glow paint do not make a comfy night's sleep).  So, Kirsten ended up getting me a sweater & two blouses from the Gap, and Grandma got me a "Support Cedric Diggory" t-shirt from Hot Topic (it's a cute shirt, and I couldn't find anything else I liked, outside of a baby shirt I would have given to Cooper Merritt--"I'm gonna poop double for you today"--but that's not the point of Xmas exchanging).

Also, Katie Ostrowski is now 25, and in case she reads this before she checks her voicemail (very possible), I wanted to take her out for Cheese & Chocolate at the Melting Pot as a present, on the night she names.

SKINNY UPDATE: I have now lost 11 pounds!  Happily, it seems to have ALL come off my belly.  My pooch is almost gone, and my boobs are just as big as ever (which I was worried about).

Harry Potter Posts: 13
Non-Potter Posts: 12
 

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/8/06

Master P is on Dancing With The Stars.  That is fantastic.

Curves: Den of Scorned Women

I. Am. Terrified.

Tonight the women at Curves were ranting about how you should never EVER date a man without running a background check on the internet.  Apparently any single man over the age of 35 will have a record chock-a-block full of offenses--child abuse, ugly divorce, traffic infractions, drug charges... MURDER.  It's not like it was one woman who had a bad experience, it was ALL OF THEM.

What the hell is wrong with boys?
 

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/5/06

Thinking back to this weekend, there are four reasons why I could never find a guy I was interested in at a bar:
 

However, I am apparently VERY cut out for the Valley:

Also, I found these on the internet and they made me laugh:

Harry Potter Posts: 12
Non-Potter Posts: 11

Ah, screw it.  It's not out of control until you start writing fanfiction.

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/4/06

Whenever I've been feeling down in the dumps, I've started reading only the love story parts of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.
 

Also, I found a really funny list (that could be years old for all I know) called "Things I'm Not Allowed to Do at Hogwart's"--I recreated a bunch of it here.  I took out most of the ones that refer to things outside of the Harry Potter world (mostly as an excuse to delete the things I didn't get), especially those that refer to the actors in different roles.  The hardest cut was definitely: "It is not appropriate to greet my Potions Master with 'Yippie-Ki-Yay, Mother Fucker!'"
 

Just got back from some serious fun in Kansas City!  Suzy & I drove out to visit Karen (and Rachel & Mike).  We went to a bar called Kelly's in the Westport section of KC with a bunch of Truman people I didn't know.  I had a blast.

Dialogues from New Years Eve 2005:

Also, during the course of the night, I saw Crying Chiefs Fan and his buddy Little Latino Man about to totally make out with each other in the bar.  And I got my new years' kiss from Suzy, since Karen stiffed her.

We went to Denny's this morning, and fortunately did not replicate our experience of Rachel having to scream at us about having shrimp sauce in her mouth.

NOTE: It is a shame that nobody entered my contest for saddest Christmas song, because the contest is now closed and the prize was a MILLION DOLLARS.  You missed out, suckers.
 

Read Comments Leave Comments  1/1/06